Wednesday, April 5, 2017

Haunted Fairhope Mural Starts To Eat Selfie Taking Tourists Alive-

    On a lovely Monday afternoon in downtown Fairhope a group of young women passing through from Ohio noticed a bright glowing aura permeating the wall space from their table at Another Broken Egg. After they downed their Mimosa's they clopped across the street to see what had attracted their attention. It was the now famous mural that most Fairhopers know instantly appeared overnight many years ago. No one is sure who painted it, we just know one morning it was there in all it's glory.

     The girls were suddenly impelled to upload the themselves with the wall to Instagram, a famous social media photography app. The beta female was asked to step back and take the photo while the rest of the group all lined up with Right shoulders facing out, hand on hips, and their best "Blue Steel" pose. The photographer, Amy Stevens, says the last thing she saw was the flash of her iPhone and instantly the girls were gone, only to be replaced with colorfully painted aquatic life.
Families of loved ones lost to the wall often come to mourn.

     Researching older Instagram photos shows that the Mural was merely plain colored blocks when it first appeared. Over the years however, It seems to be growing with painted sea creatures. One man, Skylar Holloway, who holds a PhD. in Oceanography and Masters in Necromancy has been studying the wall for years ever since he witnessed an entire Sorority from Auburn turn into a school of painted fish right before his eyes.

     Skylar tells TFI "The wall obviously is possessed with an aquatic spirit, say a giant squid, or Cthulhu. I'm not very certain, but I am am certain that the thing feeds off of Social Media. Especially Instagram.".

      We contacted Instagram HQ and spoke with customer support about the possibility of using their app for consumption of souls. They replied that yes, this was a very common practice that is most of used by models or attention seeking celebrities who need more sustenance than food alone.

TFI warns all residents to take heed when approaching the wall, and to be cautious with selfies when near.

1 comment:

  1. This is some really good stuff !
    We have feared this all along .


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